Hater?

There are many things in life that i know are just not meant for me to understand. The concept of a hater is one of them. I myself, have to much pride to hate on anyone. Hating stems from jealousy. And my mother taught me a long time ago that being jealous of what someone else has, is completely senseless.

I myself, never knew how much people hated me, or hated ON me for that matter, until of a little application for Facebook called "The Honesty Box" was invented. In case you don't know what that is, its a little inbox that people can feel free to express any thought or opinion about you, and do so in being completely anonymous. When i added the app to my Facebook profile..all hell broke loose. I was completely over-whelmed and shocked at the messages that flooded in. People would say things to me about myself that made me even ask "Are you sure you have the right person?"

What I've learned in growing up though, is that the number one reason for hate is insecurity. Which is why the target is usually someone deemed "popular" or anyone exuding confidence. I've always been a confident person. And most people who are not confident in themselves feel the need to TAKE your confidence. They do so by tearing you down with negative comments or lies and rumors, while attempting to boost their own self-esteem in the process. I could imagine that being an awful life to live. Being so jealous of a person for what you yourself can't possess. Just dreadful.

Now, there is a difference between hating on someone and simply being honest. Thats where is gets tricky. Because a GOOD hater, will use the "I'm just being honest" line whenever they can.Those are the haters that usually come in the form of friends and family. But it's all in how you deliver the message that will determines your motive. Like for instance when I start to gain weight, my mother will say

"Baby... you still have that gym membership?"

She's not hating. She's just letting me know I've been spending to much time with Blue Bell. And i can appreciate that. Because she knows that i would want to know. Now a hater would take to my honesty box and say

"Your so fat and you think your not. Well you are! Fatty Mac Fat Face!"

The difference is they are clearly trying to take a jab at my confidence. They aren't trying to help me. They are trying make fun of what they THINK will hurt my confidence. The problem is this...once i loose the weight...then what will you do? They will find another avenue of attack which they feel may hurt or hinder you. It gets very repetitive. Thats when it becomes clear whether they are a friend, or in fact a frenemy/ hater.

Then there are the people who (like myself) just enjoy a good laugh. There are so many delusional people in this world who swear everyone is hating on them, when clearly, they are just screaming for attention. Because someone with haters must be someone of importance. So i WANT you to believe i'm someone worth knowing, therefor i'm going to scream every 5 minutes about how many haters i have. When in actuality people don't even know you exist. They've created some fabricated life on Twitter in wanting you to believe they are this PERSON of status, when people of status are already known, they don't have to keep saying it over and over. And when your not for them, or simply ignore their attempts at getting your attention, they're going to refer to you as "one of their many haters". So comical right? I just continue to ignore. Besides, everyone knows broken cars make the most noise.